Kōri Rolls.
Overview:
The Kōri Roll is a new invention in sushiblading form, created by sushibladers who have fallen on hard times and can no longer afford to waste the shari water or fish stock. This breakthrough invention recycles water and stock used in the cooking of shari by reserving the liquid and freezing it into cube form.
Though the main ingredient of the Kōri Roll is water/stock, it still contains trace elements of shari and fish, which serve as a focal point for sushibladers to channel rotation. Again, these are trace elements of these ingredients, which make them unstable at best, not to mention the limited temperature conditions in which Kōri may be used to begin with.
Definitely not a good beginning suhiblader sushi, that's for certain!
Attack
Defense
Speed
Stamina
Weight
Usability
Sushiblade Usage:
As previously mentioned, Kōri Rolls are difficult to pilot. They also lack the generally robust profile of a Mab Maki or Waniika Nigiri Rolls. Hell, some might even find using Paella Marinera more easy than Kōri. But there is nothing quite as rewarding as defeating an opponent with a well-thought out strategy, powerful rotation, and the underdog that is a Kōri Roll.
Though their Attack is modest, these Rolls boast a hidden secret. Utilizing its superior Defense stat, Kōri Rolls can overcome most other sushiblading techniques, barring all-out-offensive sushiblading techniques such as Suisame Rolls.
Furthermore, the fact that Kōri Rolls are solid — or at least more solid than most other sushiblading methods — allows them to sustain more hits and possibly outlast the opposing sushi. It is, of course, weak to warm/hot sushiblading techniques, so know your matchups ahead of time!
Other usage:
Due to the minimal skill required to create one, Kōri are excellent learning tools for those who want to get into the art. Again, it cannot be stressed enough that these Rolls are difficult to rotate properly and even in the best of circumstances, are hard to make work properly, so they are not good for actually practicing rotation.
Kōri Rolls will also make for a crunchy, albeit cold snack in a pinch.
I invite you, Master Sakamoto, to come see for yourself.
Author: O'Shea Jackson
Episode:
I, as a member of the SUME-CI1, was called to Westmont from my hometown of Kanazawa because of promising claims in the sushiblading field in a far-off land. My voyage to California was lengthy, thanks in part due to Nyorai Sightseeing's poor scheduling.
But I am not here to complain about my sponsor. I am here to see if there is any merit to this Jackson's Kōri Rolls. I am no stranger to the strange and unusual, especially not when it comes to sushiblading. I have seen radioactive sushi, blazing sushi, essophysical sushi, and even conceptual sushi. The process by which Jackson described making his sushi is nothing new, but I am surprised no one else has thought of it before.
I arrived at the agreed-upon location in Westmont — a tiny home in what my gaikokujin readers might refer to as "the other side of the tracks,"2 and was met with two luxury vehicles parked outside. One was more modest, but the other was a gaudy, purple and gold thing, with a vanity plate that read "CHEFCA."
I wondered what the point of the ugly one was, but before I could spend too much time thinking on it, someone who appeared familiar, but I could not place, exited the domicile. This stranger introduced himself as simply "Chaz", a most unusual name, and he said he would be showing me the Kōri Rolls instead of Jackson. I asked what had happened to Jackson, and Chaz, in hindsight, acted a bit suspiciously and simply urged me into the house.
Upon entering, I noted a trail of scarlet leading to the kitchen, which appeared to be covered in plastic and sealed off. I asked Chaz what happened there, and he said he had been attacked prior to my arrival. He seemed fine, but I was starting to feel uneasy around Chaz. I asked him to show me the Kōri Roll sushiblade technique, and he smiled the most tooth-filled smile I have ever seen, like a wolf. Chaz then sat me down on the couch before going into the kitchen and leaving me alone in the living room.
Trying to soothe my edge, I looked around. There was a consistently appearing man throughout the photos strewn about, presumably Jackson. I picked up the frame on the coffee table in front of me and took a good look at it.
I did not recognize him.
Chaz was taking a long time, and I could hear him mumbling from the kitchen. Too long. Was he not prepared? I stood up and tiptoed over to the portal, moving aside the plastic to peer in.
What I saw then was a scene of sheer carnage. The man from the photos lay dead on the kitchen island, his blood drained and flesh and organs missing. In the corner, I could see Chaz chewing on something, his hand covered in blood. The freezer was open, and a tray of red Kōri were visible to me from within. I almost wretched.
My hairs stood on end. I finally realized who this "Chaz" man was. This was renown celebrity chef Chaz Ambrose of Ambrose Restaurants. He had recently become obsessed with sushiblading, and hyper-fixated on becoming a sushiblader.
I ran as fast as my feet could carry me, and Chaz chased after me. I could hear him for hours after I had, by some miracle, outran him; "Sakamoto sensei! Please! I want to sushiblade too! I can rotate sushi! Let me show you!" I came back to Japan as soon as I could, Nyorai Sightseeing be damned.
So for now, my devoted readers, this sushiblading technique remains un-reviewed. Perhaps another time, and to Chaz Ambrose, let's not meet.
Author: Sakamoto
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hi everyone! this was written for this is my jamcon, where i got the absolutely anxiety-inducing song Under Ice by the immensely talented Kate Bush. this song, as previously mentioned, gives me anxiety, so i felt bad after listening to it on loop for a day, and felt even worse because the original article i wanted to write was proving impossible because of a lack of available information on the subject matter i originally wanted to tackle. so instead, i wrote this which is both sillier and somehow equally as weird as my original idea.
thanks to ralliston, jak, dys, vapidpoem, dune, and the japanese branch for creating my favorite int goi. dark sushi tag on EN WILL BE REAL!