CURSE OF THE RETROVIRUS

INT - office - day

Researcher PAUL (fuck what is his last name) sits alone in an office within the SCP Foundation. Everything is gaudily coloured and in the style of the 1950s science fiction.

Paul (V.O.)1:

I awoke only a few hours ago, yet the world around me was not my own. What happened? I find it hard to believe we allowed the entire site to get infected by whatever this is… uhhh… cheesy retro virus. Yeah that works. At least I'm still fine, I think. I gotta do something about it, definitely.

Paul gets up from the chair and heads towards the door.

Paul:

Retrovirus, I'll cure the world from you!

Paul leaves through the door.

INT - hallway - day

The hallways, like the office room is highly stylized in the 1950s look. Further down is an alien named PATRICIA which loosely resembled a cross between a squid and an avian, and is green. It wears a lab coat, suggesting it's a former Foundation researcher. PAUL walks closer to the alien.

Paul:

Damn, what happened to you Patricia? Although, whatever you are is intriguing…

Patricia:
(squawks)

LORD PULPINATOR GOT THE POWER! LORD PULPINATOR WILL TAKE OVER THE GALAXY! STOP HIM! STOP HIM!

Paul:

Alright, alright. No need to be so dramatic. Can you explain where he is, and how to uhh… stop him? Maybe?

Patricia:

FOLLOW THE TELEMICE! THEY WILL LEAD YOU TO CAPTAIN COCKATOO! MIGHTY HERO!

Paul:

Captain cockatoo… wait..

Patricia:

GIVE HIM THIS!

She hands over a map to Paul.

Paul:
(looks over map)

Thanks? I guess.

Patricia:

NOW GO! THERE ISN'T MUCH TIME!

Paul:

Alright, alright. I'm going. Thanks for the help.

Patricia:

AMAZING WONDERS AWAIT YOU!

Paul continues down the hallway, searching for the "telemice" Patricia mentioned. He soon catches sight of several small entities resembling a Philco Predicta television from the late 50s. They had three legs each. Paul follows them.

Paul:

Telemice, huh… what beautiful little things you are.

Paul continues to follow them, as the surroundings slowly change.

EXT - city - day

The city resembles a mishmash of 50s scifi buildings along with more typical apartment buildings of that era. Paul keeps his attention on the telemice, while glancing over on his surroundings, highly intrigued. The telemice lead him across the gritty 1950s-esque cities, before end up at the base of an iridescent retro scifi stylized tower. It is mostly thin with a round section near the top.

Paul walks over to the entrance, and presses the doorbell. MR EEL, a black felt-like serpentine creature who wears a black stetson and a bow tie, sticks his head through the partially opened door.

mr eel:

Friend?

Paul:

Mr eel! Of course I'm a friend, you goof.

mr eel:

Thank goodness! You remember me. After this event almost everyone seemed to have changed, I just wanted to ensure that you're still you.

Paul:

Yeah, don't worry I'm still me. So, can I enter?

mr eel:

Certainly, I'm so happy to see you again!

Mr eel unlocks the door fully and lets Paul in. He then closes the door and wraps around Paul.

INT - elevator - day

PAUL and MR EEL enter the elevator.

Paul:

Okay so, Patricia, who is now some alien, handed me over a map and sent me here to give it to Captain Cockatoo. This Captain Cockatoo guy is Alistair, right?

mr eel:

Yep, but no need to call him Captain Cockatoo, 'tis a facade.

Paul:

A facade?

mr eel:

It's safer to play along with this world.

Paul:

Right, of course.

The elevator reaches the top floor, the two exit.

INT - room - day
The room is large, but lacks windows. Instead the place is full of computer monitors and glowing buttons. ALISTAIR, a humanoid avian wearing a brown suit and fedora, sits at a table and drinks some dark coffee. He takes notice of PAUL and MR EEL. He motions the two to approach and sit by the table.

Alistair:

I suppose you're still you, Paul.

Paul:

Yeah it's still me.

Alistair:

You know you can have a seat.

Paul:

Ah yes of course.

Paul sits down

Paul:

So I guess you know how the world out there is wild, like what is this retrovirus thing and-

Alistair:

Yes I've been looking into it. The source of this catastrophe appears to tie back to a cheap paperback magazine from the 1950s.

Paul:

Cheap paperback… that explains the cheesiness.

Alistair:

Indeed. Unfortunately, this book is guarded by this world's "main villain", pulpator or something.

mr eel:

Wasn't it Pulpinator?

Alistair:

Irrelevant. But I suspect our only chance at reversing this reality is by taking down Pulpinator himself. Unfortunately, despite all the shitty space adventures I had to take, and all the two dimensional people I had to save…. god what's with this era's obsession with bland damsels in distress… I don't think I've gotten any closer to discovering his location.

Paul:

I have a map.

Alistair:

Share.

Paul lays out the map on the table. It is a confusing mess of planets on a deep blue background, with a dashed red line reading towards a big red X.

Alistair:

Terrible. Whoever made this should be ashamed of themselves. So then, Luridia. Tropical planet that's overly colourful for its own good. Been there several times, didn't find anything. We could be dealing with plot convenience, or a trap. But this is the best lead we've got, so fuck it. You two, come with me.

Alistair rolls up the map and heads towards a spaceship located on the other site of the room, Paul followed with mr eel still on him. It looks like a gaudy tin replica ship straight from a scifi catalog. A staircase comes down from the entrance, allowing the group to enter.

INT - spaceship - day

The spaceship helm is covered with nonsensical buttons. ALISTAIR sits in one of the chairs, and drinks another cup of coffee. Meanwhile MR EEL takes control of the ship, and PAUL stands beside him.

Paul:

Hmm, how do you know what buttons to press?

mr eel:

Ah, it doesn't really matter. They'll all do what you want them to do.

Alistair:

And it's really fuckin stupid, no coherency in this world.

Alistair takes a sip of his coffee.

Paul:

Huh. Wild.

The spaceship leaves through a (I have the big dumb, what would one call a big sliding entrance on a roof?) and soon finds itself in space. Outside the windows stars and squid-like space creatures can be seen. Paul heads towards one of the portholes.

Paul:

Space squids? Fascinating. Gosh I wish I can study one of them, how do you manage to survive and thrive in the vacuum of space?

Alistair:

Perhaps in our proper world that would be worth exploring, here however, they exist because they look cool.

Paul:

Pity, still lovely though.

Alistair:

But it can't remain this way.

Paul:

No, I agree.

The ship is approaching a lush green and pink coloured planet.

Paul:

Wait, are we here already?

mr eel:

Yep. Space travel's pretty quick here.

Paul:

Wild.

In the corner of the ship, a TELEMOUSE is present. It remains hidden but observes the others.

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